I told him I found him intriguing and that I like writing about him. He said no one wants to read about a fucked up soldier. That’s how he sees himself. It’s the only way he sees himself. A soldier with baggage & scars just trying to function. But he’s not just a soldier to me. He’s a loyal fraternity brother, a dedicated father, a genuine friend and a kind person. I told him that once. He said those are all qualities of a soldier, except for the “kindness bullshit.” He doesn’t believe me when I say he’s gentle and kind but it’s okay. I know he is because I’ve seen it and I’ve experienced it.
He doesn’t let people close to him. He has his reasons & I’m not going to argue with them. I’m okay with waiting. In any other situation, with any other guy I would have left a long time ago. Signed him off as a prick and move on with my life. But Jack is different. I’ll wait for as long as he needs. When he’s ready, he’ll let me become closer to him. I don’t feel the least bit silly for waiting, even if others may see me that way. To hell with them. They don’t know anything about the situation and I’m not about to tell.
I’ve been trying to figure out why it’s different with Jack. When we’re alone together or just talking, I’m different. But it’s a good kind of different. I’m kinder, gentler, more patient. He brings out a better side of me, I guess.
He doesn’t let people close to him. He has his reasons & I’m not going to argue with them. I’m okay with waiting. In any other situation, with any other guy I would have left a long time ago. Signed him off as a prick and move on with my life. But Jack is different. I’ll wait for as long as he needs. When he’s ready, he’ll let me become closer to him. I don’t feel the least bit silly for waiting, even if others may see me that way. To hell with them. They don’t know anything about the situation and I’m not about to tell.
I’ve been trying to figure out why it’s different with Jack. When we’re alone together or just talking, I’m different. But it’s a good kind of different. I’m kinder, gentler, more patient. He brings out a better side of me, I guess.
He knows I care about him, even if he doesn’t understand why. I’m not positive myself. Maybe I see something in him he can’t see anymore. Whenever I’m with him, I feel good. I feel safe, not just in physical terms but also in regards to trust. It’s become harder for me to trust anyone in my life but I trust him. He would never intentionally hurt me. And even though he keeps people out, I’m closer than most.
I write about him because he means something to me. He’s more than just a subject of a story. He’s a mystery, a puzzle only a few have a chance to figure out. And he’s let me have that chance for the most part. I write about him because the more I figure out about him, the more I care about him.
Love you.
Mean it.
I write about him because he means something to me. He’s more than just a subject of a story. He’s a mystery, a puzzle only a few have a chance to figure out. And he’s let me have that chance for the most part. I write about him because the more I figure out about him, the more I care about him.
Love you.
Mean it.
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